well, yes i am, but honestly life spun out of control so much this year i honestly am amazed i was not hit by a bus by all the trying to keep up i am doing/did so lets see what has happened this year to me, shall we?
i just sat down and though well i shall most likely bring this year to a close but i am not really sure how and in what way so lets go with a bullet list, because i adore lists!
i didn't manage to get a job this year, that really was a downer especially for the first half; but then managing to get into a educational program, managing with that program to pass the entrance exam of a very good private university and trying to enter a field i always liked was an upper- however it was also a time sucker and it is still a huge obstacle. and honestly my biggest enemy in that regard is not the university, not the course load and not my obligations, it is my own lazy butt; i am a good study, and i can achieve a lot when i apply myself, the main issue is that i struggle to start the fucking studying on time, and to focus on what i have to do... i really need to focus on that problem, as my normal to do lists fail me with the studying... it might also be a time-mismanagement because i am not used to this kind of study, doing humanities is so much more easier than sciences but i am not giving up, i will struggle and fail but i shall try to solve the problem!
i failed again in my getyourwordsout challenge: i tried (again) for the 150k, and in the beginning it seemed doable but then point one happened, and school and insane hours spending going to and from school and at school my writing time just disappeared. i want to change that in 2019 with writing 30 min each day. i think i have to do it in the morning but the thing with in the morning is that nc-17 are not really fun at 5.30am... at least not to my mind, and i have several fics where i need to get some smut out to progress them so morning might not work at all, well we will see i mean 30 min is something i can totally do in the evening as well, i just have to cut down bullshit that i am doing on the time, and honestly that wouldnt be a bad idea- i have a lot of time wasters- and i dont even mean pc gaming here, because i dont see pc-gaming as a time wasting it is emotional recreation to me, i never feel as calm as when i snipe down some noobs and they never know it was me :D
this year i really have reached my limit of HD; i always liked rare pairs, but this year i think until the next hd_owlpost winter fest i will take a break; i didnt read a lot HD and really, if the story is not interesting i might not look at it, so that next year i can be a more active reader and participant in owl post, this year i really only commented on my gifts and podfics (podfics are going to be the exceptions because if i wait for rare-pair podfic i would never get to listen to podfics again...
speaking of podfics i want to record more podfics again- my goal is going to be one a month, that might be one chapter (because i have chaptered fics i got the permission for, or short stories i can do in one go. long fics i will have to split apart on my own, since i cant really read for longer than one hour, in a steady voice. however this one will have to wait until my throat decides that it is done with the soreness - yes it is still there; the laryngitis is gone the throat is still sore because it hates me, i guess. tell you what, i start to hate it right back!
i struggle with wanting a pet but knowing i dont have either, the time nor the money for it, and i am planing huge travels in my future. getting a pet would be irresponsible, i already need to find someone to baby-sit my plants when i am gone... but living without a pet for the first time is really really hard. i always had at least one pet, with my roommates the pet might not always have been mine, but it still spent time with me, so this is really hard, and kinda lonely. and the WORST part- you can no longer get a tamagochi for a reasonable price here; like the original cute ones with the long lasting battery that i had as a child? that would be awesome but no, simply not available. and i do not want one of those freaky stuffed-animal pets, those creep me out something fierce!
time management also became an issue in regards to reading... i only managed to finish 6 books this year (getting a tablet did not help with it because instead of reading books i either did homework on it or tried to catch up with fanfiction, i did read a lot of fanfiction though (also are there any apple geeks in my f-list, i do need some help please?) i shall try to read more next year- what i really need to do is cut down on time spent on youtube... because this year for the first time ever, it went out of control; usually i managed to spent about 15 min on youtube - one vid, but this year totally not. so i made a list about what i am allowed to watch on youtube and WHEN, lets hope that helps
in regard to watching too much online... i picked up chinese dramas which really, really, really honest to god really was a bad idea. two reasons: 50 min episodes (42 if you cut ending and opening) 60+ episodes- now do the math. and i am a binge-watcher; i am so since i started university back when i first moved out of my parents home. it is easier that way for a normal anime that means 24 episodes to 20 min - which amounts to about 8h; that means one night; you can watch a normal anime with two seasons in one night, easy and then not lose any day; if you go to japanese drama it is also doable: 11 episodes (the first and the last may come to 1h30 min most likely only the last as the season finale but sometimes also the first) all other episodes do 45 min with opening and ending, so roughly 35 min if you cut it down so you can watch a normal j-drama in 6h, easy peasy and you have 2h to spare and do something else, it gets even easier if you do not need to watch the subtitles because japanese gets easier the more you hear it so in the end i was even able to do other stuff while watching animes or dramas; i never did anything else if i really, really wanted to see it badly like wolfs rain, darker than black, ergo proxy, kekkai sensen, one punch man, because i figure if i want to watch something i also want to enjoy it! but back on topic: chinese drama the one i am currently NOT watching because i have no time for it is "ice fantasy" and it is amazeballs, yes it is a little high with the cgi but the characters are well written and the actors are doing their part even if the story is not always thought through the parts and the overall plot which are make it worth it. BUT i dont know any chinese so i have to sit and read it, which means even if it is boring i cant do anything else because i wouldnt understand what i am missing... and that son of a bitch has 63 episodes, it takes 45,5h aka 2 days to watch it. i dont know about you but i cant go without sleep for two days. i had my periods of insomnia, the worst was for weeks and i was not in a good place back then, and for what it is worth i already have a very thing sleeping schedule from 5.5h-6h a night with a nap of 30min during the day so i do not have any reserves to not sleep- can you understand why chinese drama is killing me? and i tried the whole one episode per day when i was a good cat and did my chores thing; it worked until episode 13 when the story really took off (and i still believed that the drama only had 20episodes...) i am now on episode 26 and don't dare to start watching it again because i know me and i am too tempted to just finish it... its stupid this habit of mine
about habits... i was kinda a good cat last year and did workout kinda regularly (there are some other breaks but those only about one week) until the end of october, it started with getting sick and ended with school stress and then i suddenly stopped all together until the day before yesterday. i want to pick it up again, because it is needed for the health of my back, and i do like to move, also i feel more energetic that way. at the moment i do this in the evening, but i am thinking of either doing it the moment i get home (most of the time i am eating then though so i would need to do that later) or back to the morning, but i dont think that i get the best benefit for when i do it in the morning...
with the writing i want to continue - i already told you about my failure in the gywo- challenge, so this time signed up for the 75k because i already manage the 70k this time and with the half an hour plan it should be doable, i want to focus on my blaise/severus story and start to post my rarepair_shorts table! and then i will continue working on my wips! getting stuff finished and posted is always such a boos, so i shall aim for that; as for fests i want to partake in hp_shoreofangst because though i mod it, i never managed to actually write for it, and that is kinda sad; i promised i will be part in hp_bunintheoven with a very rare-pair lets see if i can get it to work
speaking of what i want to do for fandom this year: fest wise:
hp_creatures fest because i missed it this year, and i want to do it again, it is always a good place for angst and rare-pairs, even if i have to prompt them myself
and of course hp_podfic_fest if it runs again! because podfic-fest!!!!
hd_owlpost because 6 years- can we do it?!!! (with the help of the amazing mods i believe i can)
other things: i have a huge beta-project with a fantastic author on the side that i will get back into it once january is over! then there is the blaise/severus fic that i want to write because i actually have the plot already and boy it is so good - if i dare say so myself, and yes angst, loads of angst and romance and friendship and just all the feels XD i want to try to put together a year long writing challenge over at hd_writers - though i am wondering if i maybe should host it here... not sure if ppl are interested: it would be a monthly-word war that will amount into a yearly count, the only restriction would be that one is only allowed to count words written for the harry potter fandom... but i am not sure if that will find any interest at all. so maybe not? i dont know - feedback would be welcome here really
i think that is it... well besides the fact that the queen is sick; yes my cat has heart problems, she is 17 years old so it is not unexpected, at the moment she is getting blood-thinning medicine and next month my father will take her to the vet again, and they need to check if she is leaking blood from the heart, her heart has grown fat on the inside which is bad... but nothing to be done about it at the moment. i will go home to her tomorrow and spent new years eve and day with her because she hates fireworks- they make her go crazy. she is getting drops already to deal with the added stress, so that she does not get afraid and make her heart labour more than it should. i hope it will work tomorrow as well. as for me, i will spent new years eve gaming: xcom one; just cause 3, path of exile and AND i spoiled myself and bought bayonetta for pc, because damn that witch is hot and i do so droll over her! she is just amazing! so i will have a nice evening as well! especially since i hardly had time for gaming since university started (60seconds and darkest dungen do not count, i only do the short things with them)
so with that i think i rambled on long enough! i wish you all a very nice and happy new year! best wishes for 2019 from me to you and may your endurance not give out on you (may you never feel like this image that currently describes my situation way to well:
Lovely to read your catch up and know what you've been up to as we haven't talked in a while.
I get the impression you're feeling a little bit down about some stuff from that past year. But I wanted to remind you to reread your first section and look at all that you managed with your education as well. You've made some massive life steps and I'm really proud of you for taking the leap.
I get exactly what you mean on the drama front!! I've fallen in love with a few thai actors and therefore have to watch all their series' obviously. It's such a time sucker!!! Luckily I've had time to waste but that also brings me to I my next point. I can sympathise about the no job thing. Since I graduated in summer I've been unemployed simply because I haven't been in the circumstance to be working - had some car trouble and moving trouble, and have been home looking after my mum after an opertation. Basically i've been feeling down about it and i totally get you.
I can sympathise about pets as well, now i've kind of moved out properly i really miss my dogs. I got a few house plants but it doesn't feel like enough. Anyway, this probably isn't that interesting. I just wanted to basically let you know you're not alone. I'm planning a proper new year thing which i dont normally do.
I'd be in for the hdwriters stuff btw. I sort of fell off the wagon with that other one you were running that ends in January. Oops.
Oh oh oh and what's this travel you've got planned? I'd love to hear about it! Love Raven x
<3 awww dear hello and happy new year and best of wishes for 2019 for you as well;
thank you for the reminder! i think that is really what i have to focus on: a LOT has happened this year and i did my very best.
*hugs* how is your mom doing? and did the car trouble go away? and good luck with the job hunt *hugs* i know how much it sucks, so i do wish you all the best <3
hopefully you have fun with your proper new year thing- and i have a LOT of plants, but they simply are not like a pet- but i am glad that i am not alone in that feeling *hugs* and you are wrong there, to me it is very interesting how you are doing - we havent had a chance to talk in AGES! *hugs*
the travel is not happening for the next 5 years or so, but i plan to go to hamburg and visit dear friend there, and i plan on going to australia and visit another dear friend there and then of course i need to make it to JAPAN because fuck it i have never been there, even after studying the language and everything for fucking years *le big sigh* *hugs* i hope you are doing well loads of love and best wishes have the very best 2019 xoxo *hugs* <3
awww thank you <3 i shall try to go easier on me (even if i think i am already going way to easy on me)
and it is strange without a pet that is for sure, i kinda like not having to feed/clean/pay attention to anybody else, but at the same time there is nothing to pet, but then again i am living on my own for 1 year and 4 months, so i think i need to give myself more time (and the real thing is that i really, really miss my queen, and am worried sick over her)
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getyourwordsout challenge: i tried (again) for the 150k, and in the beginning it seemed doable but then point one happened, and school and insane hours spending going to and from school and at school my writing time just disappeared. i want to change that in 2019 with writing 30 min each day. i think i have to do it in the morning but the thing with in the morning is that nc-17 are not really fun at 5.30am... at least not to my mind, and i have several fics where i need to get some smut out to progress them so morning might not work at all, well we will see i mean 30 min is something i can totally do in the evening as well, i just have to cut down bullshit that i am doing on the time, and honestly that wouldnt be a bad idea- i have a lot of time wasters- and i dont even mean pc gaming here, because i dont see pc-gaming as a time wasting it is emotional recreation to me, i never feel as calm as when i snipe down some noobs and they never know it was me :D 
(no subject)
Date: 2018-12-31 03:59 pm (UTC)Lovely to read your catch up and know what you've been up to as we haven't talked in a while.
I get the impression you're feeling a little bit down about some stuff from that past year. But I wanted to remind you to reread your first section and look at all that you managed with your education as well. You've made some massive life steps and I'm really proud of you for taking the leap.
I get exactly what you mean on the drama front!! I've fallen in love with a few thai actors and therefore have to watch all their series' obviously. It's such a time sucker!!! Luckily I've had time to waste but that also brings me to I my next point. I can sympathise about the no job thing. Since I graduated in summer I've been unemployed simply because I haven't been in the circumstance to be working - had some car trouble and moving trouble, and have been home looking after my mum after an opertation. Basically i've been feeling down about it and i totally get you.
I can sympathise about pets as well, now i've kind of moved out properly i really miss my dogs. I got a few house plants but it doesn't feel like enough. Anyway, this probably isn't that interesting. I just wanted to basically let you know you're not alone. I'm planning a proper new year thing which i dont normally do.
I'd be in for the hdwriters stuff btw. I sort of fell off the wagon with that other one you were running that ends in January. Oops.
Oh oh oh and what's this travel you've got planned? I'd love to hear about it!
Love Raven x
(no subject)
Date: 2018-12-31 09:25 pm (UTC)awww dear hello and happy new year and best of wishes for 2019 for you as well;
thank you for the reminder! i think that is really what i have to focus on: a LOT has happened this year and i did my very best.
*hugs* how is your mom doing? and did the car trouble go away? and good luck with the job hunt *hugs* i know how much it sucks, so i do wish you all the best <3
hopefully you have fun with your proper new year thing- and i have a LOT of plants, but they simply are not like a pet- but i am glad that i am not alone in that feeling *hugs* and you are wrong there, to me it is very interesting how you are doing - we havent had a chance to talk in AGES! *hugs*
the travel is not happening for the next 5 years or so, but i plan to go to hamburg and visit dear friend there, and i plan on going to australia and visit another dear friend there and then of course i need to make it to JAPAN because fuck it i have never been there, even after studying the language and everything for fucking years *le big sigh*
*hugs*
i hope you are doing well
loads of love and best wishes
have the very best 2019
xoxo
*hugs* <3
(no subject)
Date: 2019-01-02 08:18 am (UTC)It seems like you've achieved a whole bunch!!! Even if you wish you'd done more, I'm impressed!
(no subject)
Date: 2019-01-02 06:09 pm (UTC)and it is strange without a pet that is for sure, i kinda like not having to feed/clean/pay attention to anybody else, but at the same time there is nothing to pet, but then again i am living on my own for 1 year and 4 months, so i think i need to give myself more time (and the real thing is that i really, really miss my queen, and am worried sick over her)